This is the definition of “Purpose” according to the Merriam-Webster dictionary:
Purpose – 1. The reason for which something is done or created or for which something exists.
I need you to think about this, and I want you to really examine the deepest parts of your existence when asking yourself the following questions:
- Am I really living for what was I created for?
- Do I feel fulfilled with all I am doing in my life?
- Do I go to sleep at night at peace with my thoughts?
- Do I live each day wondering if there is more to my life?
- Am I experiencing goosebumps throughout the day that make me feel alive?
- Does my life at time feel very uncomfortable or uneasy?
- Do you end each day feeling like you knocked the devil on his ass?
If your honest answer is yes to all of these questions, CONGRATULATIONS! You have found your purpose in life. There are many however that aren’t able to say yes to any of these. Truth is, if you can’t say yes to ALL of these, chances are the purpose you currently feel you are living has been lying to you your entire life. Below are the reasons why.
1 – Society has taught us from kindergarten to settle, and be safe.
From day one, we are indoctrinated by our teachers and our educational system to play it safe. For example, how many times are we penalized every time we make a mistake? The object of our grading system measures our ability to not make mistakes. When you take a test, or perform a presentation, every time you make a mistake, you are penalized.
We have been punished by our mistakes for 18 years. After a while, you begin to settle in life, and play it safe. You do not take risks for fear that you may make a mistake that will cost you. Because of this, you are taught for 18 years that the most successful people in life make the fewest mistakes. The brain develops the most during our younger years, and if this is what is being pushed into your thought process during those precious developmental moments, you have been indoctrinated into the greatest trick of life.
These lessons we have learned over the years can’t be any more wrong! If you fear making mistakes, you will be great at school, but not in life – and definitely not in business. This is why some of the most successful icons of our time dropped out of college. Steve Jobs, Walt Disney dropped out of school at age 16. Even Albert Einstein – I can list so many. Einstein absolutely detested school because he could not stand the way the teachers taught. He thought that everything was far too objective, there was no room for questioning or thought, with the classes instead focusing on strict memorization.
Our educational system makes us suffer from “Paralysis by Analysis”. This is when we try to avoid mistakes by over thinking a situation with hopes of finding a solution that does not involve risk. This usually leads to no decision! This is what keeps you awake in bed at night wondering if there is more to your life.
I am not saying school is bad for you or you shouldn’t seek an education, but consider the above when doing so. Do not fall for the trap that has kept you from really taking risks to pursue the real purpose in your life. You can go to cpollege for 12 years, but if it doesnt reflect your purpose, you will still feel a hole in your life.
People who are successful take massive action, massive risk, and they make more mistakes, but they learn from them and apply what they learned to their life. This is why plenty of them ultimately succeed. We need to be willing to take risks, and willing to fail to find your purpose.
This famous quote from Thomas Edison when creating the light bulb sums it up –
“I did not fail 1014 times, rather I found success in finding 1014 ways that did not work”
Let that sink in, this is the thought process we need to really feel passion in our lives.
2 – You Believe that Your Purpose Should Feel Comfortable
I myself have suffered from this for many years. There is so much fear involved in life. Because of what happens in the paragraphs above, we are afraid to chase after what gives us goosebumps. We begin to think in our deepest thoughts, “That can’t be what I am supposed to do, that just sounds crazy”! So we begin to tell ourselves how crazy it sounds, and when we tell our friends, they mimic the same thoughts. This is what you are allowing into your thought process, so you stay grounded, stable in your comfortable life yet still desiring to find out what you are meant to be. You never really feel like you are flying!
I want to tell you a story, and it is from the bible. Now, you do not have to be a bible believer to get good information from this book. And I by no means am pushing religion here as I think all beliefs should be developed organically. But I did read a story in it that really describes how most of us think we should live, and how we really should live.
There is a story in there about a man named Peter. He and his friends were fisherman, and were in a boat out at sea when a big storm came around which frightened all that were on the boat. The were looking for Jesus, but he could not be found anywhere, so they really began to panic thinking that they were all doing to die.
They do find Jesus, but he is walking on the water towards the boat. They were terrified! Jesus tells them, “It is I, Take courage! Do not be afraid”! Peter yells out, “If it is you, command me to meet you out on the water.” Jesus commands him to step out of the boat. Peter does, tentatively, and even begins to sink because he was concerned with the wind and the waves. This was when he began to sink. However, Jesus asks him why he doubts. Peter then adjusts his thought process, keeps his eyes on the goal regardless and the size of the waves or the strength of the wind, and he makes it!
Now what a great lesson this is that we all can learn from when approaching our lives. Your purpose should sound a little crazy, and should make you feel very uncomfortable! The reason it does is because you know you will face obstacles while finding your purpose. You can stay on the boat and be safe, but you will again never really reach your full potential in life. You will die wondering and suffering from the what ifs.
At some point in your life, you have to step off the boat! Take a leap of faith. Burn your boats if you have to. This is what I did. I left both of my jobs, I was scared to death! But this was when I had no choice but to find my purpose. I now live it and feel goosebumps every day. When I really pushed my limits, this is when I really began to live my life, and not just exist.
Your purpose will always be found where you are uncomfortable.
3 – You Do Not Know What You Are Passionate About
Yes, this was me too. There were many nights, thousands actually where I would ask myself what it is that I am good at, or what it is that brings passion out of me. I read a book called “Wild at Heart” by John Eldridge. He was pretty brash with a lot of his statements. But one of his quotes really resonated with me.
“Do not ask yourself, what does the world need, rather ask yourself, what makes you feel alive, because what the world needs are people who feel alive”
This quote really woke me up! I began to examine my life. I found that my passions were right in front of me, I just was too blind to really see them. For too long, I was doing what the world asked of me, and not what I felt I can offer to the world.
Everyone has moments in life where they do feel like they are living. For example, some people love animals, walking them, they even spend a lot of time volunteering at shelters. This makes them really feel like they are attacking life! Yet afterwards, they go home, to a job that isn’t utilizing their passions, and they go through life just existing, and not really living. With this being said, you remain stuck at the edge, wondering what to do next, maybe for decades.
Goosebumps – I brought those up earlier. If it gives you goosebumps, if it brings LIFE out of you and not from you, this is where your passions lie. We all have them inside, we are just afraid to chase after them for various reasons. Some are financially driven. Do not fear! Go after what brings you life at all costs. Remember, you may have to step off the boat, but when you do, this is when you really start to fly. It will resonate and translate into every area of your life. As a result, not only are you really living, but your presence makes the world better. And the more you are using those gifts, the more life awards you financially, emotionally, and spiritually.
When the path of life brings you to the edge of a cliff, you can either move forward, or backwards. I am telling you, take the leap! The chains of life will break and you will really start living.
The 21 steps above is one resource I used to find the freedom I sought in my life. It was never about the money, but the time that I wanted to find my purpose. Because of this program, I can now seek all I am passionate about and all I do is place a couple of ads a day online.
Single Dad on Fire 